he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
