That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
