Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
