My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Randomize
