sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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