her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
