My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
