How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize