Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize