i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize