so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Randomize