HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.