just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
He had one of those small greek statue penises
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
