Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
