R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
