D3 body, D1 cock
K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
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