Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
