brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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