Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Randomize