Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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