literally had 100 drinks last night.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
