She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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