How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
