I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
We're too hungover to prance.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
