Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize