Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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