I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
