Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
I party with great urgency now.
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