6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
