i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
