I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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