well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
