i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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