Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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