Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
