I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i drank out of a bidet.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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