Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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