You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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