im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Sorry about my life...
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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