OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Randomize
