How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
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