Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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