i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
