what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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