No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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