The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
