Walk of Shame. In a state park.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
