Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(415): View more from California

i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.

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(415): i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world. http://tfl.nu/0s72

Replies (45) Good night (5258) Bad night (801)
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(254): View more from Texas

my sisters under your porch take her home

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(254): my sisters under your porch take her home http://tfl.nu/rfs3

Replies (10) Good night (4666) Bad night (968) Order T-Shirt
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?

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(717): he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks? http://tfl.nu/42dk

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.

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(859): I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver. http://tfl.nu/rtt7

Replies (2) Good night (728) Bad night (2827) Order T-Shirt
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home

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(612): Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home http://tfl.nu/ug2x

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(860): View more from Connecticut

i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie

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(860): i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie http://tfl.nu/y2j0

Replies (17) Good night (4422) Bad night (1750) Order T-Shirt
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(905): View more from Ontario

He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.

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(905): He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later. http://tfl.nu/c4t5

Replies (25) Good night (6217) Bad night (922)
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(989): View more from Michigan

dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away

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(989): dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away http://tfl.nu/dlah

Replies (30) Good night (1591) Bad night (7556)
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(818): View more from California

I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.

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(818): I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder. http://tfl.nu/z8u4

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(609): View more from New Jersey

my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours

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(609): my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours http://tfl.nu/c2a1

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(315): View more from New York

hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.

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(315): hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time. http://tfl.nu/7nlf

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(979): View more from Texas

She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?

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(979): She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low? http://tfl.nu/2el8

Replies (9) Good night (785) Bad night (1647) Order T-Shirt
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(440): View more from Ohio

Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...

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(440): Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet... http://tfl.nu/o56f

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.

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(902): I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas. http://tfl.nu/cu8d

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(708): View more from Illinois

it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus

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(708): it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus http://tfl.nu/ryiv

Replies (3) Good night (687) Bad night (168)

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