kristin has been a bad kristin
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
