If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
